Sunday Reflection: The Good Thief?

Today's reflection is brought to you by 

Thanks to Philip K for sharing
this image on Flickr

Luke 23: 32-33, 39-43.

The three of us walked 

the same path

to the top of 

the hill.

We were subjected 

to the same punishment

and felt the same pain.

Or did we?

Two of us

deserved it

according to the

colonizers' law.

But you.

While we were engaged

in cutthroat pursuits,

you were helping

and healing

and talking about

--and showing--

how to love.

You.

In agony,

like we were,

for no reason

that I could see.

My partner-in-crime

muttered and scoffed

at the would-be-Messiah

hanging between us.

I am sure 

you heard him too

and finally, 

I could bear it no longer.

We have been condemned justly,

for we are getting what we deserve for our deeds,

but this man has done nothing wrong.

Jesus,

remember me 

when you come into your kingdom.

I could not 

see your face,

nor you, 

mine.

I knew of your deeds

from the stories 

people told.

What did you know of me?

Did you know 

the atrocities

I committed?

You made

no comment,

asked no question,

nor insisted on confession.

Just

Truly, 

I tell you,

today you will be with me in Paradise.

Millennia pass

and I become known as

the Good Thief.

But that's not 

it 

at all.

You welcomed 

me

as you welcome

everyone.

No matter what.

You offered love to 

me

as you offer it to 

all.

We may not be 

all that we could be,

we may not even be 

good,

but you love us 

into Paradise.

Period.

Thank you 

for your grace,

which makes up

for all we lack

and loves us 

home.

+Amen.

Patience for something beauty-full

My six-year-old blooming
Lionheart amaryllis

Some years ago, I asked a florist to send an amaryllis to my dear friend in Belgium as a Christmas gift. Gaby was delighted and wrote to me, saying, "she is very beauty-full!" So the next fall, I ordered a bulb for myself, and planted it so it would bloom for Christmas. And yes, she was very beauty-full!

She also managed to produce a roundish pod where one of the flowers had been -- because I transferred pollen between the blossoms with my fingers. I allowed the pod to ripen into a hard brown shell, and eventually it cracked and opened to reveal many black, flat and crinkly seeds about the size of a loonie (dollar coin here in Canada).

I turned to the internet for information about how to grow an amaryllis from seed, but all I could find was that they produce the plants in Florida, and it takes about four or five years from germination to flower stage. Wow, that long, I thought.

I was game to try for germination at least, curious what those flat black seeds would do. So I spread them out in a large-ish shallow pot, covered them with a fine layer of soil, and kept them well watered. Before long, the pot appeared to be growing fine grass.

That fall, I transplanted a dozen of the grassy plants into small pots and left them to grow in a sunny window through the winter. By the next spring, they looked like baby leeks, and I put a half dozen into four slightly larger pots and set them outside, bringing them indoors before first frost. The next summer, I kept only the three healthiest specimens. For three years, they spent their days in the sunny back yard or the south-facing kitchen window, depending on the season.

But last fall, as they were ending their fourth year, I cut the leaves from bulbs about the size of medium onions, shook the dirt from their roots, and put them in my basement cold room for a winter's nap with my original bulb, which has bloomed every year after its winter break. 

I promptly forgot about them all -- until after Easter!

The one that didn't bloom

In the middle of an episode of insomnia, I remembered! The next morning, I planted them in some good potting soil and set them out in our little greenhouse, where they put out some healthy looking leaves... and two of the three plants sent up a flower stalk! All that patience had paid off!

I gave one amaryllis to my sisters and one to my mom, and the flowers didn't disappoint! As Gaby said, they were "very beauty-full." Perhaps the third plant hadn't stored quite as much sunlight as the other two, as it hasn't blossomed. Maybe next year!

The lesson I am taking from this is that people are like amaryllises. We all grow at our own pace -- especially when it comes to discovering and accepting the truths of life. For some people, it takes much longer than others. 

In this season of uncovering many painful truths about Canada's colonial history and its myriad injustices against our Aboriginal Peoples, we need to be patient with one another, not to give up on each other. If we can bring each other along with gentleness, kindness, atonement, forgiveness, and healing, hopefully we can all bloom together into something very beauty-full.

Please pray with me for that, and let's all do what we can to further reconciliation...

Sunday Reflection: To be like you

This reflection is brought to you by
Hebrews 5:1-6.

Though you are God,
O Christ,
you don't hold yourself above us.

You are the one who walks among us
and who acts as our liberator,
the high priest
who offers himself
in place of the poor gifts we can give.

Because you lived our life
and understand human fragility,
you are compassionate,
gentle,
and forgiving of our weaknesses.

And we are called to be like you:
compassionate,
gentle,
and forgiving.

Not only to others,
but also, to ourselves.

It's not easy to be like you.

Please help us.

+Amen.

Talking Circles to heal a nation

On a snowy day last week, my daughter and I participated in a women's Talking Circle at one of our city libraries. Christina called and invited me at the last minute, and suspecting that a Talking Circle might have something to do with the Truth and Reconciliation Commission's Calls to Action, I agreed to attend with her.

(In case you missed my earlier Moodlings about the TRC, Canada has a long history of mistreatment of Aboriginal peoples, most especially through the Residential School System, which saw Aboriginal children taken from their families and put into schools far from their homes run by government and churches. The idea was to destroy the Aboriginal culture and replace it with a version of state-sanctioned Christianity -- your basic cultural genocide of the First Peoples in a country being settled by Europeans. The damage done by the Residential Schools is multi-generational, and many of the problems faced by Indigenous people continue. The Truth and Reconciliation Commission's efforts to address these injustices led to 94 Calls to Action, many of which are still only on paper.)

Our Talking Circle was facilitated by Sharon, one of Christina's university professors, and it began with a feast of bannock (!) and delicious beef stew. Chairs were arranged in a circle, and about a dozen of us sat together, discussing the snowy day for starters.

Soon Sharon gave us a page explaining talking circles. I was struck by this quote:

"The Circle has healing power. In the Circle, we are all equal. When in the Circle, no one is in front of you. No one is behind you. No one is above you. No one is below you. The Sacred Circle is designed to create unity..." 

-Dave Chief, Oglala Lakota, Grandson of Red Dog/Crazy Horse's Band.

Sharon, who has a Métis background, began our gathering by acknowledging that we were gathered on Treaty Six Territory, and offered a brief prayer and welcome song with her drum. Then she invited us to smudge, though the library didn't allow the burning of sage or sweet grass. We passed around the sacred medicines -- sage, sweetgrass and diamond willow fungus -- enjoying their fragrances. Then we stood in our circle as each woman smudged imaginary smoke from the medicines in an abalone shell over our five senses and our bodies as we prayed for healing. Sharon shared with us a link to a scientific study that showed that the use of medicinal smoke reduces environmental toxins in a room, and I'm sure Aboriginal people have many other wholistic practices that come from ancient earth wisdom. It was a calming, meditative start to our afternoon.

Then Sharon invited us to share our names and our genetic backgrounds, as each speaker held her turtle rattle. A talking circle is just that -- a place where a person who holds a special object has the opportunity to talk, and the rest of the people in the circle listen with respect and without judging, until it is passed to the next person. It turned out that a third of our group had some indigenous heritage, and the rest of us were children of "settlers" in Canada. So much history, so many things to be healed.

The second time around the circle, Sharon invited us to share about something on our heart. And in the sharing, we realized how we were different, and also how we shared many similarities. Struggles, sorrows, illness, joy -- we had all experienced them. I was also quite touched by the elderly Indigenous woman beside me, who passed on her speaking times, content just to listen, though I'm sure she had many stories she could have shared.

And the third time around the circle, Sharon shared a story about a crow who wanted to be an eagle, from aboriginal author Richard Wagamese's book, One Story, One Song (2011, Douglas & MacIntyre, ISBN 1553665060). It spoke to all of us in different ways, and we expressed how the story fit with our lives. Then Sharon closed the circle with one more prayer, and we said our farewells and headed home through the snowy afternoon.

To experience a sharing circle with complete strangers made me see how Dave Chief's words about it having healing power and creating unity is absolutely true. Each person listened respectfully to everyone else, and though we came from diverse backgrounds as people of Aboriginal and settler heritage, the stories told and the tears that flowed bound us together in friendship in two short hours.

I am someone who is quite aware of the privilege I've grown up with, so I was a little apprehensive about how a circle would actually work. But it did work because no one blamed or judged anyone else, everyone was respected, and deep truths were spoken. We were all invited to share, we all listened, and we all came away with a deeper appreciation for each other's lived experience.

I'm not sure if Talking Circles are part of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission's 94 Calls to Action, but I really hope so. I'll have to read them to find out. Regardless, reconciliation requires sharing of life, deep listening to the struggles, hurts and joys of others, and a respect that leads to friendship. At our women's talking circle, we got a preview of what healing our nation, learning from Aboriginal people, and healing settler biases and prejudices could look like.

Hope for healing Canada comes through forgiveness, friendship, and community. If you ever have the opportunity to attend a talking circle, I'd highly recommend it.

And I think Richard Wagamese's book will be worth a read, too -- I'm going to borrow Christina's copy!

No stones in my soul

This is just too beautiful for words.

Kudos to L'Arche International for these wonderful shorts, which touch on the most important things in life.

Another good one to send forward...

Remember Monica Lewinsky? What a mess her life became, all because, at 22 years of age, she fell in love with her boss, who happened to be the President of the United States. (Who didn't fall in love with the wrong person at age 22? I'm thinking of Charlie, ten years older than me, the kind of guy who would never grow up...) I'll admit I didn't give much of a thought to what Monica's life was like because of the mistake she made at age 22, but she has to think about it every day. (I mostly forget about Charlie, thank heavens.)

In this powerful video below, Monica talks about how the internet and our society have created a culture of humiliation and shame that devastates too many lives. It's too easy to make anonymous judgments, and too many of us jump to nasty conclusions that we air online. We forget the old piece of wisdom that we heard as children, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

Negativity only breeds more negativity, shame, and humiliation, but every living being on this earth deserves compassion, regardless of her or his mistakes. Monica says it well, and I admire her for standing up and saying it, especially given her past hurts, which had to be huge.

The thing is, we are all part of the solution. The next time I run into negative comments, I'm going to throw in a positive one if I can. Thanks, Charleen, for sharing another good one, one that I'm sending forward as definitely worth watching. Enjoy!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_8y0WLm78U

From conflict to grace

It's been a very interesting week for moodling. Not that I've done much here, online, but I've been doing a lot while dog-walking, crocheting, and working. I'm spending a fair bit of time these days writing up an interview I conducted for the history of L'Arche Edmonton, one that was particularly painful because it encompassed a time of conflict and gossip in the community.

The thing is, the people involved at that time were all really good people, doing what they felt was best for the community at that moment. But human egos got in the way, and in protecting those egos, it became easy to act less than charitably. We humans are a funny breed -- we so easily convince ourselves that what we do, we do for others, not ourselves, and sometimes don't see that for the power trip it can become.

That's where it can be helpful to have a wise and impartial third party come in and offer an outside perspective, but only if that party's suggestions are carried out. In the portion of the L'Arche history that I am working on, the mediators weren't heard, and for many people, the hurt continues, its tentacles sometimes touching into what happens here and now. Time doesn't necessarily heal all wounds.

I wish I could heal it all, but I'm not God. All I can do is moodle and pray about it, and try to learn from it in my own, human, limited way. The biggest thing, perhaps, is seeing and admitting my own mistakes and foibles, asking forgiveness when I am wrong, and working to make things right again. Then grace has a chance to take hold.

Of course, every bit of grace costs some ego! I guess that's why international conflicts are so difficult to solve -- so many egos are involved. I'm thinking in particular of my fellow blogger, Debbie, and her husband Dean, ecumenical accompaniers in East Jerusalem. You can find Debbie's writing by clicking here. And if you have time, maybe you can send a note to your politicians regarding a just end to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. That's on my list of to-do's for today.

There was a small conflict in my house last night that needed to be brought to grace, and I was one of the instigators, so I had to ask forgiveness of everyone involved, and work things out. Maybe, just maybe, I'm getting better at seeing my own sins and mistakes more clearly as I get older, but I still have a long way to go to get to grace, full-time.

How about you?

Wisdom, Truth and Reconciliation (Day 4): Remembering the Children

There's another full day of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission today. Events can be found by clicking here. This evening around 6 p.m. there will be a gathering of people at the Shaw Conference Centre who will walk in solidarity (as I understand it) to the Alberta Legislature to wrap up the TRC. All are welcome.

For today, I close with the prayer with which our volunteer training began on Thursday morning, which I think originated with Anglican Church leaders on the 2008 Remembering the Children tour across Canada....

Remembering the Children

God of our Ancestors,
who holds the spirits of our grandmothers and grandfathers
and the spirits of our grandchildren,
Remembering the Children,
we now pledge ourselves to speak the Truth,
and with our hearts and our souls
to act upon the Truth we have heard
of the injustices lived,
of the sufferings inflicted,
of the tears cried,
of the misguided intentions imposed,
and of the power of prejudice and racism
which were allowed to smother the sounds and laughter of
the forgotten children.
Hear our cries of lament
for what was allowed to happen,
and for what will never be.
In speaking and hearing and acting upon the Truth
may we as individuals and as a nation
 meet the hope of a new beginning.
Great Creator God
 who desires that all creation live in harmony and peace,
Remembering the Children
we dare to dream of a Path of Reconciliation
where apology from the heart leads to healing of the heart
and the chance of restoring the circle,
where justice walks with all,
where respect leads to true partnership,
where the power to change comes from each heart.
Hear our prayer of hope,
and guide this country of Canada
on a new and different path.
Amen.

Click here to see Day 1...
Click here to see Day 2...
Click here to see Day 3...

Wisdom, Truth and Reconciliation (Day 3)

Day 3 was my day to volunteer, so I didn't get to listen to very many sessions. But there were experiences worth remembering...

... a man whose painful past made many of us cry... and add our tissues to the collection for the sacred fire...

... a woman who said, "I forgive my abusers, not because they deserve my forgiveness, but because I deserve to be free of the pain and hatred. I am free!...

... Terry Lusty, whose poems I appreciated yesterday, telling me that once he became a teacher, he taught in a First Nations school that burned down, and it was forced to relocate to an old Residential School... he never thought he'd have to enter a Residential School again, and here he had to teach in one. It must have been difficult beyond imagining... I wish I had asked him how it was for him...

... two women chuckling at class pictures they found in the archives (where I was volunteering) over the expressions on their faces, and the faces of their friends...

... looking around the tables at the archives area where so many people were poring over photo albums and feeling it was, in a way, like a big family reunion... except for the pain...

Click here to see Day 1...
Click here to see Day 2...
Click here to see Day 4...