Wednesday, September 11, 2024

A busy Southern Alberta summer

It's been quite an unusual summer as Lee and I have made several trips to Southern Alberta in order to care for his dad.

Dad Louis was born and raised in Southern Alberta, and when Lee's mom passed away in 2021, we explained to Dad that it would be much easier for the whole family to visit him if he came to live in Edmonton. But he wouldn't hear of it and remained living in his house until last September, when he lost his driver's license and we knew that it would be dangerous for him to continue living alone through the winter.

Our kids came to help us, and we moved him to an independent living senior's apartment on the last day of September, 2023. We spent a few months after that clearing out the house, and sold it in May.

Dad was mostly happy living in his new place -- he loved the meals, served restaurant style -- and his apartment was just the right size for him. But after dental surgery this spring, his health took a sudden turn, and the dementia that had been hovering around the edges of his life set in, full force. 

When we visited in June, we found Dad confused and unable to care for himself, so we increased the presence of homecare companions to give medications and help him get dressed in the mornings. And we spoke to him again about seniors facilities in Edmonton where we could help him out without having to drive 500 km every time something went wrong. "I was born in Southern Alberta, and I'll die in Southern Alberta," was his response.

Lee and his brothers took on a lot of extra responsibilities over the summer months, scoping out places where Dad could receive more care, taking over the finances he could no longer manage, hiring Jovy, who cared for Lee's mom in her last years, to be his companion and check on him every morning. We visited and phoned more frequently. But on August 15th, one of the residence's homecare aids sent Dad to Emergency because she found him wheezing, lethargic, and unwilling to get out of bed; that was his last day in his apartment. 

Dad spent almost three weeks in hospital being treated for various infections, and last Wednesday, he was released into a cottage for people with dementia. He's not happy about that because he loved his previous home with the view of the lovely courtyard garden, the staff and residents who complimented him on his tomato plants, and his job of sweeping the benches around the building clean through all seasons. He liked to have things to do. (We loved the place too, and are sad that his time there ended so soon.)

We're not exactly happy either, because he's still 5 hours away, none of his children have a home base or place to stay there, and trips south are tiring, plain and simple. But we love him and continue to support him as best we can. We worked like dogs last week to set up his new place and empty the old one. Local charities benefitted a lot from the downsizing we had to do.

For the time being, Dad is "storming" a bit -- not cooperating with the staff very well, and we are so grateful for Jovy's presence in his life because he trusts her. Today she took him to a medical appointment, and he cooperated very well with her. She's family to him as much as, or maybe more, than we are, because she can be there every day.

We're keeping our fingers crossed and praying hard that Dad will soon settle into "Louis' Place" with its deep purple door. It's a hard change for him, but we know he's safe and cared for. We're counting our blessings that things happened so quickly and safely for him, and we thank all those who knew about these challenges we were facing and kept the whole situation in prayer. 

Prayer works!

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